A Very Sad Diwali

I can already feel the sadness of Diwali this year . The saddest and the toughest that my family and I will experience. It will not be the same ever again without Appa by our side. This time of year he will be very busy driving up and down buying so many things for all his children and making sure everyday we have so many things to eat. From the freshest fish to the delicious murruku . But this coming Tuesday , he is not there. What a painful journey . I miss him very much ..and I have been crying at office so many times . Although I have a wall just for him beside me in my room in my office , it will not be the same as having him around. I missing all his random calls including those when he call to tell me how lonely he was or how excited he was waiting for all of us to come back for Diwali . As strong as I am trying to be for mother, it is not that easy . And I'm crying now again while pouring my feelings of sadness.. I'm not that strong after all :( . Love you Appa, may BABA bless your soul and accompany you on your journey in the afterlife . Om Sai Ram

Princess in the house 01112012 !

Our beautiful Eye Candy !

Happy Anniversary Mala & Uday!!!!!!💝🎎

I Love You Appa

Relay For Life 2012-A Walk Dedicated For Appa With Undivided Love

What an emotional night. I literally imagine and saw Appa everywhere last night , as a survivor but not as someone who fought succumb to the big C. We lighted a candle for him for his remembrance with a decorated paper bag . It was decorated while my tears decided to pour like heavy rain during the monsoon season.

Part of me was angry, that Appa left us all to soon, but another part of me is relief that he is no longer in that dreadful pain.

We walked a few rounds around the stadium as a mark of respect to all cancer patients and specifically in dedication of our dear Appa with tears non stop flowing from beginning till end. It has been 5 months but I'm still in denial..

He is around. That's what I believe or at least that what I want to believe.

Love you Appa. Wish you were here for good .

Forever Loved

 

 

A Special Rose For You Appa

 

Immortalizing the immortal memory

Baby got this yesterday and the pain of the tattoo procedure was worth it .

 

Sat Shri Akaal BABA शिर्डीचे श्री साईबाबा, شردی سائیں بابا

شردی سائیں بابا

शिर्डीचे श्री साईबाबा

Shirdi Sai Baba

SAI BABA symbolically placed on top of THE KHANDA ( khaṇḍā  ਖੰਡਾ ) and permanently placed around baby's chain . So beautiful with the Great Sai's Blessing all day long and close to the heart .

Mighty Mouse To The Rescue !

Again Nivey saved another boring day .....

 

 

 



 

Pinky Kitty!

 

Pining Over A Missing Piece Of Puzzle

I can't sleep . I feel so sad . If I feel sad , baby must have felt worse :(. Whether its just an SMS , it is still from Appa wishing happy birthday . Amma couldn't take the pain just now , just when the clock struck 12 and the date changed to 29th July , She had her 'silent' cry and couldnt even bring herself to wish him happy birthday .The sadness of knowing that her beloved husband isn't around to wish her handsome son happy birthday like he normally have. I truly understand the feeling .While blogging this , I felt a slight choke trying to not cry while my baby sleep beside me . It's his birthday , but the best ever gift that he would love was to have Appa around,even when Appa was sick , at least he was around .

They say time will heal , but why are my tears falling to my cheek now ? :( .To console myself everyday I am reminding that he is no longer in pain, but that's not working ... Dear Appa , if you happen to see us today , if you happen to watch over us today , do know that your children pines for you. Please bless your son on his birthday .Please watch over him ..

 

Happy Birthday Baby 29072012

My Baby's birthday is tomorrow and I'm waiting for him to come home to give him his gift today , a few hours early than his actual birthday which falls on the 29th .

A simple gift from me and it's hidden inside the card *see the green thingy slightly showing out?* .

Happy Birthday Baby , I love you very much . I'm sure father is wishing you all the health and happiness , wherever he is ...he loves you.

 

 

I'm Nanban Reporter

 

Flower Power

No one get as much flowers like I do even on normal days :)

 

 

Pink Always Make Me Happy :)

 

Target Practice :)

 

How was your day today?

 

Safety Training!

This whole week of mine was occupied with safety training . I was initially furious! when I saw my name in the list and even asked Vinesh and Thevan if I had done anything wrong to them that made them include my name in. Thinking of the hot sun and how black I will turn out to be after the training made me sooooooooooooooo angry .

However ! It all went the other way around! Having completed the training , I now realised how important firemen are to the community. Their equipments , clothes , gadgets are so heavy but they still have to drag that whole bunch of things when they work and that's not including the heavy hose ! The hose itself when it is dry weigh easily around 15-17kg and when wet , it shot up to weigh easily around 20 kg. Imagine all those weight WITHOUT the victims they had to rescue ! Double WOW!

The fire that they have to "tame" make their work even more complicated .So much of guts and so much of energy !

What a noble job! They save lives and sometimes sacrifices their own lives.

Please people , do remember that they are not around just to be available when you call them up to chase snakes ya , there are bigger things than that and that is making sure people live :). Infact , I honestly feel that they are much more better than police anytime !

Tabik Tuan!

 

Picture Perfect Moment

 

This picture perfect moment captured made me cry today :(. How I wish I could turn back time :( .I wish I knew where he is now , if he is looking down at us ....this sadness is beyond belief .

Happy Birthday Marran 10072012

Happy Birthday !! Many happy returns of the day . BABA bless you :)

Appa Memories Compilation From Raja

 

Missing Appa

 

At work , but I'm missing Appa :( . What a dreadful feeling . This is worse than Monday blues .

Great Weekend With Kutty

Kutty made my weekend a fantastic one ! Look at him playfully showing off his rabbit teeth . Lol ! Love you kutty .

Nivey's Elmo!!!!

Didn't manage to get the jumbo Elmo , so I had to settle with this singing Elmo . Can't wait to see Nivey sing-along with Elmo! Lalalala Lalalala Elmo's World !

 

 



 

Elmo's World

Nivey wants Elmo . Hrmmmmm... Where do I get the jumbo size here :/ . Mission of the week : must find Elmo for nivey kutty ... Lalalala Lalalala , Elmo's world ............

 



 

Countdown To A Lonely Father's Day

 

If I had to do my life over , I'd chose you to be my dad.
I love you and honor you:
You take all of my sorrows away.
I am happy to call you my dad and,
am proud to be your daughter in law.
There were times when we disagreed.
But you still mean the world to me.
Your love has always been pure;
You've treated me as your own
You've always taken me as your real daughter,
instead of just saying daughter in law.
The day that I lost you , my world shattered
But it was worth all the tears in the end.
For you'll always be the sunshine when the
skies go grey and now silently protect me , When I reach a rough end .

I love you Appa.

Handsome In Memory

Always in memory . Rest in peace Appa . You are always remembered and always close to our heart .