19 days of Misery

Dearest Appa , it's been 19th days and I think I have started to come to terms that you are permanently rested and your soul is at peace wherever you are now. Deep down I still wish that I didn't push back to pj that day when you left , but i did , and I am still feeling the guilt. If only I knew , I wouldn't have left you alone and I wish I was by yourside when your journey to the other side of heaven happened . I wish I was there to hold your hands , a small comfort which I wish I could've given you . If only .....

Dearest Appa , I wish I had given you a sense of love when you were around and I truly hope that I didn't offend you in whatsoever way . I hope that all the love and care given is up to your expectation .

Dearest Appa , the videos of you singing two weeks before you left is such a valuable sweet memory and I'm really honored to have recorded it . I never knew it meant the whole world to everybody . It's like re-living YOU all over again inside all of us. It's so beautiful .

Dearest Appa , I wish you were around to protect me , I feel a bit left-out and it hurts . Rest in peace Appa.

Love you Appa .